There is overwhelming evidence suggesting that if you incubate three dozen worms in a solution of amino acids and carbon compounds for approximately one and a half million years they will eventually evolve into the Long Island Railroad. The only problem with this theory is that if this were true some species of fish would [...]
They say that living to a ripe old age is a blessing. But when you do it while standing on line at the DMV, you begin to see things from an entirely different perspective. Suddenly, the expression “something to look forward to” can mean something as mundane as seeing a DMV employee get back from [...]
Many lucky relationships take off like a rocket and, in spite of occasional ups and downs, last a lifetime. However, a great number of relationships don’t fare so well. Why? What makes two people incompatible? How do you recognize the elements of incompatibility? And how do you avoid getting entangled in a no-win situation? These [...]
How To Shower Like a Woman:Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror – make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, [...]
Peru recently had a huge record breaking Earthquake, a whopper at 7.8 on the Richter scale. Days later the volcano of Fire in Mexico erupted. Now we already know that President Bush is responsible for the Tsunami last year and both Hurricane Katrina and Hurricane Rita. This was reported from a very reliable source Al [...]
It’s all jus’ dialogue!The Chia Pet Commercial…I’m sure everyone is fully aware of the Chia Pet commercials. However, afterwards, the commercials were modified to sell a different product…Woman: I love Chia Pets! I bought one for my son, my daughter, my husband, and… myself![Camera cuts to the woman's family.]Son: Yeah, it’s really hard on us, [...]
It’s all jus’ dialogue!An Interview With TruthIt is almost popular now to casually remark on the negative effects of smoking cigarettes. “Yeah, that’s almost as dangerous as smoking,” one teen comments about the suggestion of jumping off a bridge. His popularity rating gained 7 points, which would be lost when he later made the comment, [...]
A formal date can mean different things to different people – a night out on the town, a Broadway play, a lavish meal, an intellectually stimulating encounter. Sometimes a date can mean nothing more than just getting out of the house. However, not observing proper etiquette can turn the courting process into something it should [...]
Jesus is lord! Wheee!!!!So there I was, just cruising the internet looking for a batch of pornography. I go to www.busty-amateurs.com, an old-time favorite site, and what do I see!? No content, no join, no free-tour (heh, what I used every time), no news, just “Jesus Christ is Lord.” And below that “Click Here for [...]
Be careful what you wish for. Entering the baby’s room one day, I noticed a subtle odor, not unlike a used diaper or a moose with a gas problem. A thorough search revealed everything in order and clean, so it must have come from the baby. “Marielle,” I thought, “You stinky devil.”Opening the window helped, [...]